A friend always has to be a good listener. But does a listener always have to be a friend?
I've listened to much. Why couldn't I be treated as 'the friend?' Did you just use me? Was I just called because you had no one? Or was I just called because I was the only one?
I have a story here. Almost the same thing but two different people. Pretty sure I'll be talking about the same people again soon within this blog so I'll assign a codename for them. (Okay, now I just can't think of a codename) Okay, Person A and Person B. Let's say Person A is a boy and Person B is a girl.
Person A was a friend. We understand each other, we feel each other's emotions, we are pretty much almost the same. And that similarity of ours made us closer. Closer. Our talks meant so much to me. All the things I thought I was the only one who has been suffering was also felt by her. The feeling was... great! It's nice -- having someone who could understand you! Until a drama hit me, he wasn't valuing me as much as I value him. I almost thought he was the 'best friend' during those times. I almost thought he cares about me as much as I had. But no, everything I thought was just when-I-have-no-one-to-talk-to situation for him. And whenever I see if he has something to tell or share with me, I always fail to feel I was remembered. And most of the time, I don't see myself being acknowledged as something or anything by that person. It sucks, really. Fact, he was feeling this way as well -- that no one cares about him, that he's the one who reaches people, that he wasn't remembered at times, that he doesn't have anyone at all. Well, what the heck? You feel that because you, yourself do it to others, to me who really cared about you.
Is person B still a friend? Who knows? She came to me a while ago and told me that 'she misses me.' Oh well, what can I say? She actually unfollowed me on twitter. I'm just not too sure if that's intentional. Whenever the other friend is not around, there she calls me. Do I need to elaborate? I believe, yes. She has been my friend, has always been my friend. We confide to each other, we share secrets, almost everything! But why is it that I feel this way?
I'd like to thank the both of you. Thank you for once being a friend. Well, we'll still be friends but I'm not gonna be the one who is a reserve, waiting for you when you need me. Thank you for making me feel so awesome, so grateful of having you as friends.
I'm sorry. Sorry 'cause I won't make it up to the next time. Sorry 'cause I won't be around when you have no one. Sorry 'cause I'm not gonna be reaching upon you anymore.
I wish though that can do all of this.
So, I suppose this covers the entire drama? Bye.
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